Seeking Marriage Counseling - Who Should Couples Turn To During Their Storms?

Just about every married person has a story to tell...about the time their spouse got on their last nerve! And you said... that would be the last time! But before givng up on your marriage, what about turning to a marriage counselor? Now the question is "who do you go to?" "What do we look for in the counselor's qualifications?" Some might say the best thing to do is turn to your religous leader, but then I have people who have said they don't want their pastor to know their business because they would not feel comfortable worshipping in the church knowing the Pastor knows what's going on. I can understand that. However, my next door neighbor went to a secular marriage counselor when he learned his wife was cheating on him... and the marriage counselor helped his wife determine that she should leave her husband of many years and their three kids to be with the man she met a casino. This is another story I will share on another day. I will call it "drama in the suburbs." But back to the counselor thing. What do you think the best approach is to solving marital issues...especially when you feel you are at the point of no return. I pray this discussion will help those who are afraid to ask...but really need help.